Most awesome forum thread ever!

You read the title.

Sick of Etsy!

The first post is spot on, it's both hilarious, excellent, and a reflection of the sad truth.
Of course, the first thing that was posted were comments by forum assholes about how the OP needs "drugs".
I guess that pretty much sums up the current etsy experience, if you're high you won't notice the lack of sales or traffic to your shop.

This was equally awesome:
Etsy Don't know the difference between Handmade and Mass Produced??

Also, how about answering this fucking question:
Etsy admin can you clarify something please?
just fucking answer it.

And, BTW, we'd love to see the questions posed by The Savant answered.

From the Desk of The Savant

From the desk of The Savant

Preamble: if you are ever out with your snotty college educated buddies drinking in a bar, do not ever tell them the story about that time you ran statistical algorithms from data that you derived from the phonebook....

-----------------------------------------------------------

Dear etsy,

Please explain why there are so many items on your site and so few of them seem to make it to the front page.

Please explain why there are so many items on your site and the same items keep appearing on the front page treasury.

Please explain why it is that when your own site users complain about this, completely and fully defining what they are complaining about (e.g. what constitutes a “repeat”, how often is too often, what moderation really means), that you continue to exhibit the behavior they are complaining about.

Please explain how your staff continuing to place the same items by the same sellers on the front page treasury in spite of the collective outcry against the practice by your site users is not an expression of contempt by your staff towards your users.

Please explain why the same treasury curator’s treasuries keep making it to the front page in spite of the fact that at any given time those treasuries by those same curators are literally less than 10% of the treasuries available for use at any given time.

Please explain why your staff cannot choose a broader range of different curators when placing member made treasuries in the front page treasury slot.

Please explain why the same items appear in multiple storque articles simultaneously.

Please explain why your staff cannot seem to broaden their horizons and feature and write about a range of items that they have no personal connection to. In other words, why can’t your staff write a Storque article without personal references or involving items that they personally like. For instance, I used to work in a deli, and while I may not be that fond of Amish potato salad, that never impeded my ability to sell it to customers. Why is it that your staff cannot express this sort of professional behavior?

Please explain how hard it is to be presented with a topic and simply write a few paragraphs about it in a concise and factual manner, and then choose saleable items that are directly relevant to that topic.

Please explain the lack of coupon codes.

Please explain the inability for shop owners to batch edit the prices of their items.

Please explain why you would redesign something as ubiquitous as the search bar without getting a broad range of opinions about your design choices before implementing them without so much as a bit of notification.

Please explain why the lettering on the new header was so small.

Please explain why in spite of the fact that in the thread started by Rokali regarding the design changes that there were an overwhelming number of complaints about the size of the font of the header and why nothing was done to correct this error within 24 hours.

Please explain to me the merchandising qualifications of your staff.

Please explain why 98% of the items featured on your front page treasury appeal only to a female consumer demographic.

Please explain how excluding mens’ items almost entirely from your merchandizing features is in any way, shape, or form proactive for the benefit of your sellers.

Please explain why everyone can’t have a treasury.

Please explain why it’s so hard to get a treasury.

Please explain why it takes sooooooooooooooo long for the treasury to load.

Please explain to your staff members that if they are going to use their etsy staff user names for their twitter accounts, that it is then completely inappropriate and unprofessional for them to twitter such personal information as whether or not they have “PMS” (specifically DanielleXO).

Sincerely,

The Savant, etsy shop user

-----------------------------------------------------------

They call me Vanty (which is apparently supposed to either be cutesy or short for The Savant… apparently “TS” just didn’t drip with awesomesauce). I have a college degree, I graduated magna cum-laude, and with honors. I have a full time job. I also have an etsy shop.

Items from my shop do occasionally appear on the front page treasury. And by “occasionally” I mean once every four months when etsy member’s bitching about the staff’s constant featuring of their own personal favorites reaches it’s fever pitch, the damn breaks, and there seems to be some forced altruism, which usually lasts for like 2 weeks before it’s back to the ugliest shit on the face of planet earth from lirola, toybreaker, absolutely shitty horrible mockery-bad photoshopping hell from maclancy, et al.

And you know what I tend to notice when my items make the front page? That your staff seem to have the inate ability to pick the ugliest fucking thing available for sale in my shop. I’m serious. I want to be happy about making the front page, but really, your staff chose that? Fuck.

And I’m not the only one who has noticed this phenomenon: that when your staff selects items from someone’s shop for one of their front page treasury they tend to pick the most disparate item: the item that is least representational of the overall theme, style, pattern, color, size, or general scheme of whatever it is that you sell.

That’s a horrible strategy: to display to potential customers the one item that most marginally represents your inventory.

Conveniently I have an example that is twofold: your staff pick’s the odd item out and front page repetition.

http://www.etsy.com/shop/lucysnowephotography

Twice yesterday I saw this photo on the front page:

CHIHUAHUA IN A SCARF FINE ART PHOTO 8X8

http://www.etsy.com/view_transaction.php?transaction_id=26522462

And the only place I have ever seen this photo is on the front page. I have run many searches generically in the art category, more specifically in the photography category, and yet the only place I have ever seen this photo is on the front page.

Why is that? Probably because I don’t like dogs. So, I would never specifically type “dogs” into the search bar, let alone Chihuahua.

Now, aside from the fact that the title is in all caps, which is just obnoxious, as someone who simply doesn’t like dogs, this particular item has absolutely no appeal to me. So, seeing something that is actually an enormous turn-off twice in one day really isn’t spurring my ability to pull my credit card out of my pocket…

Which is funny, because I’ve clicked through Lucy Snow’s etsy shop before. And with the exception of that fucking Chihuahua, I actually enjoy most of her photography immensely. Unless she shuts down her shop or floods it with 400 repeats of that Chihuahua photo or cards, then the vast majority of the items in her shop could be classified as nature photography. You know, because the subtitle of her shop (as I type this) is “Urban Art for Nature Lovers”.

So, I went to her shop, which had 80 items at the time, and counted them; subdividing them into generic basic categories: outside, animals, inside / still life, frame.

outside: 56 items | outside = trees, landscapes, sky, landscape + animals

animals: 13 items | animals = animal is primary focus of photo

inside / still life: 9 items | inside / still life = Chihuahua/chair or flowers in a vase

frames: 2 items | self explanatory

Why did I separate the Chihuahua out of animals? Because the Chihuahua is sitting in a chair, all the other animals are outside.

So, 97.5% of the 80 items in stock are either prints or cards.

86.25% of the 80 items in stock are either prints or cards depicting elements of nature that were photographed outside.

Why is there any significance to those numbers? Because they are above 8%. If that raises a question, then I suggest you google a tutorial about statistics.

The reason that those numbers matter is because they are ridiculously high percentages. The vast majority of the items in Ms. Snow’s shop aren’t “like” that Chihuahua picture. The Chihuahua is a domestic animal, photographed as a portrait dressed up in clothes (which is not “natural”) in an indoor setting. Where as the vast majority of the images for sale in the shop are actually objects of nature photographed in the environment they exist in as they exist.

The Chihuahua, statistically, is the aberration. It’s categorically different than most of the inventory in that shop. Categorically, given my general dislike of dogs, I actually enjoy most of the rest of the photography in that shop… but no one on the etsy staff ever spends a second focusing on the items that constitute the majority of Ms. Snow’s catalog of work for sale on etsy. All they ever show me is that fucking Chihuahua.

Now if I hate dogs, or more specifically, I hate Chihuahuas, then I would have utterly no reason to click on the image and see real breadth, depth, or variety, or realistically the actual theme of Ms Snow’s work. And she has some wonderful photos. But I don’t like dogs, and all you ever show me is the one thing I don’t like. Which, in all actuality is not an average representation of the artist’s work.

Having a staff with marketing degrees or professional merchandizing experience would never create this scenario, let alone replicate it repeatedly. It’s completely antithetical. You should show me items from sellers that are not the exception or aberration to the bulk of their inventory, but items that are shining examples of the kind of work they’re actually trying to present.

I imagine Ms. Snow spent some time conceiving her photos, editing her photos, formatting them for printing, listing them, considering what theme / color scheme / style to use for her banner, inventing a subtitle / tagline for her work, etc. And yet, your staff can’t show me what by virtue of the bulk of her inventory, her tagline, and her banner — what she is actually intending to sell me.

You show me the fucking Chihuahua.

Why? Probably because some nitwit on your staff loves dogs or wants to buy a puppy. Because that seems to be the kind of reasoning that goes into the decisions that are made by your staff: they base their decisions on their own personal taste. That’s shallow. That is so shallow.

An actual professional would put the intentions of their sellers before their personal preferences. That is not what is done by your staff. Your staff’s philosophy seems to be staff first, sellers – meh.

That is simply contemptuous and ignorant.

Instead of sitting around the office drinking pretentious coffee and tweeting your favorites while trying to invent “trends”. How about looking at what is actually available for sale on your site, and find a way to make the most people successful at selling what they actually seem to intend to want to sell?

Don’t go to someone’s shop and pick your favorite, actually go to their shop and pick something that seems representational of the vast majority of their inventory.

Your staff needs to act like they’re staff. They need to act like professionals. They are not the average etsy user. They are employees. They are paid on the basis of our listing fees. They ought to be qualified to earn those checks. And they ought to act responsibly and professionally and in the best interests of their sellers.

------------------------------------------------------------------

Now, since I did all the reading and the counting, as I frequently supplied “The List” while some have suggested this is an inappropriate venue… I am too fucking lazy to start a blog and run around the internet randomly commenting on people’s blogs in a vain effort to get them to come to mine.

Since I can’t make a treasury because the feature isn’t amenable to the fact that I have a full time job:

Thursday Treasury

http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=33266048

http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=42859529

http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=42650566

http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=38864517

http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=42345390

http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=42867128

http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=36447276

http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=24519831

http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=42912334

http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=42966799

http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=30929384

http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=41745384

http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=39101848

http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=41381495

http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=42707553

http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=34688715

Etsy blog reader survey / St. Patrick

As I type this...
Seapinks
humblebea
munieca
terminy
and
SewnNatural
are on the front page.
The previous front page featured Lirola.

I'm sick of fucking seeing the same shit by the same people. Don't buy from these etsy sellers. Avoid them like the plague and advise your friends to avoid them like the plague.

It's pathetic that etsy continues to take home paychecks made from your listing fees but cannot be bothered to do any work promoting most of you.

Now, onto our scheduled editorial from The Guy
(and, yes, it's a little dated)

http://www.etsy.com/storque/etsy-news/survey-says-the-results-of-the-blog-reader-survey-are-here-7223/

I read this and nearly spit my cheerios at the screen:

"... I also want to acknowledge many of the sellers who commented that they want to see more diversity in viewpoints, rather than just those of the Admin. We do have partners and Guest Curators and contributors, but I agree that Etsy needs to do more to open up blogging to more folks in the handmade world. The Etsy marketplace is like a rain forest of tastes and styles and interests: there's more diversity of creativity here than anywhere else on the Internet. There's just no way that our small staff can accurately represent everyone while maintaining that authentic, personal voice. I'm looking forward to a day when we editors aren't bottlenecks (many of you have noticed that the pitch form is closed) or are seen as as gatekeepers who don't have the same Favorites as you. My strategic view is that Admin need to be facilitators in connecting our members, while also being the real people behind Etsy.com. There will always be Admin bloggers because of the quote above, but we'd like to develop an efficient system that allows for more content from our members."

So, then, your staff are collectively retarded? If so many of the people who responded to your survey indicated that your staff are completely self centered and narrow-minded, then you really don't need another survey to better serve your community. You need to fire your staff.

I believe I already stated that I am a graphic designer. I have projects, I have clients. If someone hires me to make them a brochure, then it shouldn't look like my personal scrapbook, it should be what they asked for, and I should have discerned their desires by asking the right questions the first time around.

For instance: the "keep it weird" posts are all stupid. Collectively, we here at this blog when discussing those posts refer to them not as "keep it weird" but as "keep it stupid". Why? Because it's all stupid shit, to put it as my girlfriend phrased it.

For instance: "Keep it Weird: St. Snakes"
If this was supposed to be about St. Patrick's day, then why not tell us something about the legend of St. Patrick? As the son of the two people who were the products of Irish immigrants I have to wonder how hard it really is to paraphrase the story? It boggles my mind. That and all the references are to ridiculous cliches.

My girlfriend has no Irish in her family, and yet, like most Americans she simply wears something green on St. Patricks Day. Neither she, nor I, nor my parents ever made green bread. How hard would it be to mention relevant cliches?

Moreover, it's an IRISH holiday, how hard would it be to find something on etsy that was actually from IRELAND?

How does linking to a wikipedia page constitute having actually done work? It's one thing to do it on your personal blog, where presumably no one is paying you to type things. It's entirely unprofessional for an employee of a company to do something like such a hack, especially without an adequate paraphrasing of anything relevant about the saint or the holiday.

I'm not interested in personally knowing Michelle. I'd be interested to see her fired. I've already seen enough of her posts to know that her imagination is quite limited and that she comes across as entirely self centered.

But back to that blog reader survey...
Had etsy sent a company message to every user encouraging them to participate in the survey then the results of the survey would be more stable, more accurate, and more meaningful. As I understand it, this is not what happened. Therefore, any statistics gleaned from this survey are relatively meaningless.

97% of the survey takers were female. The seller respondents were largely female, but not as highly skewed as the shoppers. The ladies love Etsy! One of the frequent comments people wrote in was that they wished there were more shopping content for men — and indeed more items for men made by Etsy sellers.

In spite of how flawed the data is: this is an alarming number.
So, here's the analogy:

If I own a restaurant, and for shits and giggles I'm going to call it "Snarf" (because I don't think that's a real word, and it also rhymes with... or because I enjoyed Thundercats as a tyke).
So, if I have chefs from all over the place in my kitchen and, technically, we offer just about every food dish on earth on the menu. Then my clientele should be all over the place. All races, colors, creeds, social classes and other cliches mentioned in Martin Luther King speeches should be frequenting the joint.

You know how I could fuck that up?
No, it's not the lighting. No, it's not the plates, or the silverware, or the staff uniforms. I could fuck it all up simply by only putting certain items in the deli counter, in the front of the menu, and in the display window.

If I only have lemongrass and organic fair trade sugar crystals on a stick in the front window, with a giant elaborate display of a montage image composed entirely of the vast array of legumes... you know, if I stock the deli counter with tofu and carrots, and have posters on the wall espousing the greatness of almond milk, then I'm going to end up with a customer base that is largely vegan or the slightly less crazy vegetarians (both of which are still crazy).

It doesn't matter if one of my chefs makes the best baby back ribs this side of Atlanta, if I never put that on display, then no one knows it's there.

Your staff are the drizzling shits as far as product placement and marketing are concerned. They should all be fired and replaced with people who are competent at understanding that 97% of respondents being female is unacceptable in a marketplace that professes to be the place to buy and sell ALL things handmade (whether you took that off the tagline or not).

The reason you don't have any men isn't because they don't exist, it's because you're morons.
How in the fuck does this appeal to me?
http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=40883256
It doesn't. It's not something my girlfriend would wear either; I wouldn't buy it for her.

How in the fuck does this appeal to me?
http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=35948928
It doesn't. It's not something my girlfriend would wear either; I wouldn't buy it for her. Moreover, as my girlfriend notes every time she sees vintage shoes: foot fungas!

How in the fuck does this appeal to me?
http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=41788713
It doesn't. And I've really tired of seeing this girl's shitty paintings. There are so many people on etsy who paint, with better technique and better substance.

How in the fuck does this appeal to me?
http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=39981103
It doesn't. It's not something my girlfriend would wear either; I wouldn't buy it for her. And, in her own words she said "this is retarded."

Are you shitting me?
http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=37236306
Oh fuck, I thought this was a lady's shirt. Vintage or not, I would not be caught dead in that, it's ugly.

Am I trying to be an ironic hipster doofus?
http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=42627983
Because I wouldn't be caught cleaning the gutters in this t-shirt.

A yarn hat?
http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=42582548
Fuck. Oh, but it's for women, so what the hell does it matter?

So that your child may contract someone else's athlete's foot
http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=41538632

Some sucker bought these
http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=39691954
but what the fuck do you do with what otherwise look like colored hairballs? Do you enjoy spending time trying to figure out how to meticulously clean the dust off of them?

Women's size 5 doc martins
http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=40796501
these are so ugly they're almost ironic. And I'm a guy, so they wouldn't fit me. Plus, they're used shoes so the possibility of foot fungus looms!

If a seventies baby blanket could be a hat
http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=40808868
then I imagine it would look like this, and you would smile at your crazy grandmother as you inwardly considered coming to her house in the middle of the night and bending all her knitting needles in half. This could only be worn for punishment.

I have a penis and testicles, how does this appeal to me?
http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=35058043
Really, an apple cozy? What would I need that for? Am I prone to seizures and there's a fear that I will bash my lunch sack against a wall? I have no use for this other than mockery.

no talent hack
http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=28990491
Really, feature a real artist.

do I wear this to the tranny convention?
http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=41142505
Or is it casual cross-dressing friday at the office? Again, I'm a guy. I wouldn't buy this for my girlfriend.

what did you guys get tired of amberalexander, so you found crap that looks just like hers?
http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=30697498
twice in 24 hours, no less... and still, not something that appeals to me. Diversify, assholes.

Why?
http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=42466961
I'm not into flappers.

no talent hack
http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=42245685
seriously, there's no ART on etsy actually made by the people selling it?

more lady stuff, this time in "charteuse"
http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=29285585
Again: penis, testicles, heterosexual, not a tranny.

Fuck, it's time for another round of drinks
http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=40505111
this + the apple cozy + the yokoo = me the winner of front page bingo!

99% of the items featured on the etsy front page have a consumer target demographic that is female. You have completely removed men from the equation, and when you include them, just as with Michelle's idiot storque paragraphs, the examples are idiotic and insultingly cliche.

Your staff is so fucking dense and retarded that they see nothing wrong with reducing men to the cliches of ties, t-shirts, and knitted hats... oh, and cuff links, how could I possibly forget cuff links. And that's your problem.

It's called moderation.
Mech
http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=27382070

Going East
http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=30754499

Chromed Grind Your Gears Mug
http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=35896968

The Farrago
http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=40925093

cherry pencil jar
http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=32420064

grey messenger / laptop bag
http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=40841628

Cowhorn Hair Comb
http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=31191308

hand dyed upcycled men's shirt
http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=38926958

beach bliss
http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=24331338

touch of wood pen
http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=39380827

baltimore oriole
http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=31167946

puzzle coaster
http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=33176736

You know, there are items that appeal to men that also appeal to women. It's not really that hard to find them. They can easily be incorporated with things intended solely for women, and they aren't entirely cliche. Likely, I could come up with 12 items that are just art.

I don't see why etsy doesn't understand what diversity means. I really don't. I've been a professional graphic designer for years. If I looked over my portfolio, no one would be able to pinpoint my gender in a heartbeat. That's what good design does, it defies immediate classification because it's appeal is broad.

Etsy's appeal isn't broad. If you can't understand that from the results of your survey, then you should be fired. Continuing to have narrow-minded self centered people making the decisions is a horrible idea; and they're doing a horrible job.

The Storque: I want my listing fees back

First off, on an aside, Seapinks sucks. Stop showing us this dull shit. Seriously, BORED.

International Women's Day? Really, Etsy?
One of us makes calendars and admits that this was googled, because, as that one said

"Women's Equality Day" is the 26th of August. I put it on the calendar every year. My sister is very active in a chapter of NOW (National Organization for Women). She was pleased to find that as the lone 'observance' in August when she got her yearly calendar.

Well, then we read the rest of the wikipedia page about International Women's Day and discovered why we never seen this on a calendar:

Started as a Socialist political event, the holiday blended in the culture of many countries, primarily Eastern Europe, Russia, and the former Soviet bloc. In many regions, the day lost its political flavour, and became simply an occasion for men to express their love for women in a way somewhat similar to a mixture of Mother's Day and St Valentine's Day. In other regions, however, the original political and human rights theme designated by the United Nations runs strong, and political and social awareness of the struggles of women worldwide are brought out and examined in a hopeful manner.

Don't misinterpret: we're not anti Commie, and we're not anti-Socialist, we're not fucking retarded "tea-partiers". But really? Of all the obscure things our etsy fees go to as features was this Storque article? Man, I can't wait for all those Storque articles about Hindu observances, and the ones about the Muslim holidays... you know, but I'm not going to hold my breath waiting for those or something.

So, basically, the "article" is actually a PARAGRAPH. And it says nothing about what "International Women's Day" actually is historically, how it came to be a holiday, who celebrates it, etc. If this was English 101, then this paragraph gets a "D".

This holiday is primarily celebrated in Eastern European countries. So, the caveat tacked on at the end is:

"From Madame Curie to Gloria Steinem, Queen Elizabeth to Angela Davis, what women have inspired you?"

All of whom are Western women. Could the references be any less socially relevant to the culture that invented this observance? Michelle couldn't spend 10 minutes googling influential lady communists?

Moreover, than the paragraph completely lacks any context or definition of what this observance is, is that it references some dopey personal tale of religion. If you can't bother to look something up to write something relevant and the only thing you have to go on is personal experience, then, well, congratulations on opening the door for a personal attack. Fuck, your feminism is that you read about girls instead of boys? That's fucking trite. Fail.

So, basically, this holiday is like the communist / eastern european version of secretary's day ONLY for women. Fuck.

So you showed us a wrist cuff
http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=35356334

a painting of a woman in a bunch of leaves
http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=13562455

a librarian style outfit
http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=41493844

a women's fashion journal
http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=42031234

a stenciled t-shirt
http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=41851901

a plastic plaque
http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=36836573

a painting of a nude woman
http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=23628903

a paper mache fertility sculpture
http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=39486837

strange Yoko Ono poster
http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=37325233

zine
http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=40863610

a blue leotard (modeled on a waif with a blank expression)
http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=40956024

balm for stretch marks
http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=42241657

a woodcut print of the back of a woman's head
http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=40619523

a montage drawing of 1940's starlets
http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=39859676

a painting that shows a nipple
http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=7013295

Michelle is kind of like a nipple, isn't she? We mean that as the British slang. Go back and look at your Liam Gallagher quotes. Except she doesn't have the talent of George Harrison.

This Storque paragraph was idiotic. The collection of items that went with it were equally idiotic. The entire thing was a demonstration of ignorance.

You want to celebrate women, their accomplishments, their feminism, the equality they've attained? Fine. But do it like an adult, not like some idiot-fuck ignorant child with no respect for context.

The Cake
Yin
Whatever you want
Night Flight
Antique Style Butterfly Necklace
12 handmade heart embellishments
vintage women digital collage sheet
felted flowers necklace
hidden stories
Industrial Revolution Brooch
pendant
Happy Flowers

You know, International Women's Day, which has never appeared on any calendar I have ever purchased in America, whether it be at Hallmark, or Barnes and Noble, or Walmart, seems to be an international holiday, celebrated abroad. Logically, wouldn't you celebrate women by showcasing things that are made by women? And more apt, made by women from countries that actually celebrate the fucking observance? Oh, shit, that was using logic.

Now, we know, because we copied and pasted things into "shop local" that apparently there aren't a lot of shops on etsy in - let's say - Turkmenistan... so we went a little crazy with Romania, and the Ukraine. Obviously, I suppose, the entire list could have been composed of things made in China. Oh, go read the wikipedia entry.

How fucking hard is it for your staff, who are paid through our listing fees, to use the god damned wikipedia and a fucking online dictionary?

My mother was a feminist. I'm a feminist. I'm not a fucking nazi, I'm not militaristic, I'm not religious. I'm just a woman, and I make things. But that shit in your article? It doesn't do anything for me as a feminist, except raise my ire at the general ignorance of the etsy staff. That paragraph was a contextually bankrupt reference to a foreign holiday written by an American with no mention of the meaning or history or context of the holiday. That was fucking ignorant.

Oh, shit, that's right, I have a life

Funny thing is that I have a life, and a firm belief in lone-wolf style blogging. Otherwise, the co-conspirators would have been more than happy to have done the work for that week I was taking a real life vacation from my full time job.

Oh, fuck! I have a full time job, which means I have health insurance and paid vacation and sick days. Fucking A, my priorities must be all fucked up... you know, because I went on vacation.

Now, amusingly, there is a perfectly good list of front page repeats from last week or the week before — fuck, having a full time job that provides you with a paid vacation is FUCKING AWESOME! Yeah, anyway, somewhere in my email there's a list, but I'm going to skip it for the time being. Because, well, shit, I just got off vacation and my lazy ass doesn't feel like spending 20 minutes copying and pasting.

So, instead, I'm apparently just going to insult people, because really, that's what I feel like doing.

You see, when you keep showing me the same tired old shit by the same people, and I look, and I sneer, and perhaps roll my eyes, and think about what a narrow-minded insular group of jackass fucktards the etsy admins are, well, here's the thing: I've seen the fucking product.

So, it's focus group time:
shebboDesigns:
It's either a painted rock or it's a pre-made ceramic item with a decal cooked onto it.
What the fuck? Seriously, etsy staff? Did you guys totally suck in whatever entry-level ceramics course you took way back when at summer art camp or what? Because, yes, I've seen the shebboDesigns ceramics on the front page repeatedly, and after a brief consultation with the council this is what the focus group has to say:
"I should hand wash this mug? Really, why, because if I throw it in the dishwasher then I will discover that the decal was either applied at such a low heat that it will flake off, or is of such low quality that it will literally fade from the bleach that comes standard in almost all non-douchebag-idiot-fuck-environmentalist ordinary old fucking cascade or electrosol or whatever the hell generic store brand dishwashing powder that normal people who don't spend $7.99 for the smallest amount of ounces of 7th generation throw in their dishwasher, you know, because they have jobs and better shit to do in this era of technology than to sit there and fucking handwash dishes.

What we're really saying is that what shebbodesigns is selling, if it isn't a painted rock, looks like mass-produced pre-glazed ceramic elements that were probably made in China, which have a decal or china paint baked onto them on a lowfire kiln setting. Because, you know, when you can buy the mugs already bisqued with a coat of glaze, then you don't refire them on a high-fire setting.

Really? There aren't like any ceramics artists on etsy? It's very important that my listing and selling fees pay your salaries so you can spend your time promoting decals that have been cooked onto mass produced mugs? Holy fuck, take a ceramics course.

Oh, and my other option is a painted rock. If I wanted a painted rock, logistically, wouldn't I find a brownie fundraiser or a church bazaar? What the fuck am I going to do with a painted rock? You know, I mean if I was bat-shit insane and lived like a fucking hoarder, then absolutely, by all means bring on the painted rocks! Or, you know, if I fucking had children, well, my children could paint me some motherfucking rocks. But really, you want to help someone sell me a fucking painted rock? Holy shit.

The next thing we'd like to offer you some focus group advice on is this Storque article
http://www.etsy.com/storque/spotlight/green-your-wardrobe-with-ecouterres-jasmin-malik-chua-7176/
We're a varied bunch, but we all read this and collectively groaned.
First of all, what's the age cap? Do you realize, that unless you have a reputation for being that annoying fucking bat-shit insane vegan asshole who thumbs their nose at the rest of their co-workers (oh, fuck, we here all have jobs, we keep forgetting that our real world perspectives get in the way of all this fantasy-envirofuck fun) — there is no way in hell you could conceivably get away with wearing this shit anywhere?

For shits and giggles we all took turns.

birthday romper: am I 22 going on 55? Because this makes my tits look like they're in my fucking lap. I guess if I buttoned the jacket I could try to hide this monstrosity. But on what casual friday holiday could I stroll into the office with this get-up? Is it dress like a 1990's catalog hipster day? Because, I mean, really: cleavage with a romper with a jacket with black leggings with saddle shoes? Where the fuck do I work at? An ironic hipster factory? If I have to wear this to show that I'm green, well, then, fuck it. Someone get me some styrofoam boxes for the ozone layer.

Hoodie Wrap: It displays both the horror of being a hoodie, and the idiocy of being a wrap. Oh, and the sleeves are apparently 5 times too long. So, you know, I could wear this to the office and look like I was fashionably inept because the design is for some 20-something that doesn't fucking work at an office. If I strolled in wearing this, I would probably be pulled into the supervisor's office for an inquiry as to whether or not I was ill... Also, what if I'm fat? Seriously, wrap-anything looks terrible on fat people, let alone a wrap hoodie with asymmetrical placement of pocket.

strapless flannel dress: Because nothing says "going green" like fabrics that contrast ridiculously with one another. Really flannel + strapless = WTF. Is this for when I miss winter in the middle of summer? Or because I have an ironic hipster dance to attend? Where do I wear this? And why does no one who sells clothing seem to own an iron? I can already hear my mother groaning.

supayana grey reconstructed top: First off, one of us actually works at a grocery store, and cannot imagine what the fuck the co-workers would be thinking if that person walked into work wearing a reconstructed top wherein an excess sleeve was used as a collar. The general feeling is that you would be sent home for inappropriate wardrobe. Do I have to be so impractical as an environmentalist that I have to wear clothing that would make ordinary people question my sanity? Do I recycle: sure. Do I occasionally buy things at Goodwill: sure. Is a shirt sleeve acceptable when used as a collar: no. Is the ribbed empire waist and the asymmetrical placement of pocket supped to add something to this monstrosity?

Alice's Dream: At first, like an idiot I said "lingerie?" But then I read that this was a "dress". Am I fucking Lady Gaga? To what occasion do I wear this "dress" in public? Yes, hello Grandma! Happy 77th Birthday! Awesomesauce! Thank God! I comes with a slip sewn in, you know, because really my guy friends should politely use their imaginations and creatively ponder my pubic grooming habits!

Wool SeaWeed Neck Garland Scarf Yellow: This one was in the article just so that we could laugh at the title right? Again, if I wore this to work there would be inquiries about my sanity. The only suitable occasion we could invent for such a garment of such lengthy description (c'mon, it's both a GARLAND and a SCARF!!!): hoighty-toighty church. Because while I am an atheist, I am told that if I wore this to normal church, people would be looking at me funny. Or, I guess since it pulls apart, if I were to ever lose my "honor cord" from avant garde fashion school. This would be excellent for a back-up.

Organic Vegan Weekender: The Savant says "osh-kosh-pagosh," and "I was so ten years too old for Osh Kosh Pagosh way back when it was in fashion, what's with all these shitty eighties color combinations? Is it because all the hipster doofuses of my generation already bought out all the good seventies crap that we have to move on to what is currently available?" Do I have to be kooky to be "green"?

sweet hat: I have long hair. Really long hair. I don't wear hats like this. I'm also not a flapper. And none of us can name a "flapper church" that we could wear this too. Other than a costume party, none of us could think of a single place to pragmatically wear such an article of clothing without presenting as some sort of hipster fucktard.

Herrinbone Harris No More: 1989 called, it wants it's bow fetish back. Seriously, herringbone and hot pink? I'm not sure even hoighty-toighty church would accept this one.

Gina Michelle Jigsaw Falling into Place: I'm being told that "my mother's McCall's patterns from the seventies called... you know, the ones you bought at my garage sale for 25¢ a pop. Anyway, they want their — holy shit this listing comes with a poem! — decade back." Again flannel? And no less "silk and flannel" — to what occasion do I wear this attire? Surely not the office, unless I want to get called in for the sanity check, again, or violating the "it must have sleeves" dress code.

Pretty Birdies Military Jacket: Only if I'm 22 and I don't know any better. Look, I recycle, but I'm too old for this crap, and this is looks like something I would be wearing to the ironic hipster fucktard equestrian something or other where there are no real horses but we talk about how terrible it is when they turn them into glue.

Eco-chic Ballet Flats in Purple: I'm not into cloth shoes, particularly the kind made out of canvas. Go kill me a cow and get me some fucking suede.

East Earrings in Bamboo: okay, these are kind of cool, but I'm guessing I'm going to get one of those anonymous emails later about my patchouli perfume / deodorant.

As it turns out, the only thing in this article that was neither snarked or resulted in "meh" was the alice in wonderland necklace. Of course, then we clicked on it and saw that it was from Singapore. Eh, whatever. My lazy ass isn't forking that over for shipping.

It's funny, because with 1 or 2 exceptions, most of us recycle, and many of us are female, and under the age of 35. But none of this shit in this article appealed to any of us. We could all see who it was meant to appeal to, but in that we recognized that familiar stereotype, well, we all know what we think of that stereotype, and it's all negative.

We don't hate the earth, it's just that the vast majority of this shit is either crazy or completely impractical. And all of it is not our demographic.

We're tired of seeing hipster shit. Apparently we're ten years older than the rest of you and not enamored with your cause de jour, or your demographically stunted impractical items of your cause de jour. I'm an adult, an annoyingly responsible one with a job, friends, and a social life. And none of this shit works for me. And yet I recycle and craft and garden; like a normal person with a full time job.

herding cats... PART 2

You see, we read the etsy forums. We do. And we tend to notice things. Sometimes it's deader than shit in there... and sometimes you're all posting the same damned things over and over. Now, unlike some people, we don't get all pissy about the 8 millionth person who has posted the same fucking question that has been posted a million times already. It is actually not that easy to search forum topics.

Now, what we had noticed, besides the front page repeats, was that there was something that had been missing from the forums... And the thing that was missing is the sort of thing that connects directly with front page repeats. What was missing were those goofy dumb threads where someone we've never seen post a god damned thing before comes on to the forums screaming with CAPITALS and exclamation points!!! in site help (where it actually doesn't belong) about how happy they are to make the front page.

No shit, motherfuckers.
What, did you jealous, no-FP-feature, heartless bastards hate those people?
(yes, that was sarcasm)
Sure, they're dopey, sappy, saccharine... but those are the kind of posts of utter happiness that make the place seem like it isn't filled with a bunch of self centered douchebags.

I don't see maclancy popping onto the forums everyday to thank the fuck out of etsy for the daily front page treasury features. Likewise, I don't see any of those threads by Seapinks, or thrush, or duende74, or slinkymalinkicat, or krize, or allencompanyinc. Now why is that? Is it because they're ungrateful bastards, they "know better", they expect front page features, they don't fucking care? It's happened so often that it is no longer in any way shape or form special to them? Apathy? Greed? Gluttony?

You know, the people that never get the front page treasury feature are all happy to be all greatful and teary-eyed and red in the face about it because they're just so tickled that someone finally came and looked at their shit. But the fuckers that the etsy staff works so hard off the dime of your listing and selling fees to constantly promote can't be bothered to show up with public displays of gratitude.

Amusing, no?

Probably about as humorous as herding cats. Oh, google the phrase, for fuck's sake.
Now, it has been pointed out by the council that we failed to properly harp on something to the necessary extent in the intial "herding cats" post.
Sold items in treasuries: don't do it.
Now, when I say: "you sent me a convo with the link to your treasury that you featured my item in, and I go there and click on shit and it comes up as sold" — I'm not referring to things that were sold yesterday, or that day. When I'm talking about don't put sold shit in your fucking treasury, I'm talking about things that seem to have been sold for days, a week, multiple weeks...

So, the problem solver says:
The curator is careless.
The curator is an idiot.
The curator didn't click on the items they copied from their list, favorites, or poster sketch.
The curator did click on the items they copied from their list, favorites, or poster sketch, but they left the sold items in there because...
The curator is careless.
The curator is an idiot.

OR... there are long since sold items in the curator's treasury because they copied the items out of their favorites, their list, or their poster sketch which they made a long damned time ago, but because it's so fucking hard to get a treasury that it's been sitting around on their desktop or in their cache forever, and they didn't even realize it.

So, is it that you guys are a bunch of dumbasses who won't click on the items that you put in your own treasuries to bother to see if they're available for sale? OR is it because it's actually so much harder to get to actually make a treasury than the forum assholes insist that it isn't (you know, if your priorities are in order)?

Likely, it's a smidge of the former and a whole hell of a lot of the latter. We're talking 10% curator is a dipshit who didn't click on their own picks, and 90% the curator complied the items for the list and then had to wait for weeks for the treasury to open at a time that was convenient for them.

What a broken fucking system.

For instance, right now Galit has two treasuries going with Lirola, MyMoms, and rafya in them:
http://www.craftopolis.com/index.php?user=lirola&com=th&x=0&y=0
Really? Because riorita has two treasuries with gaialai... one of which features Lirola and MyMoms, the other with galit, rafya, and TeaPartyHats (who is in one of the Galit treasuries).
Now, gaialai has a treasury which also features MyMoms, duende74, and rolyzcreations, where rafya is an alternate...

You know, because it's really important to always have 2 treasuries all the fucking time that feature exactly the same fucking group of people... while the rest of the peons on etsy with the wrong priorities can't snag a single fucking treasury. And when they finally do, it's weeks after they actually made the list, and they're so unfamiliar with the system that they don't know to click on their own treasury picks (like all the regulars do) to make sure that they're current, because, likely, some sanctimonious lying sack of shit forum asshole has told them that clicking on their own treasury picks is cheating or some such bullshit because it increases your number of clicks, and my god, you're a horrible person... why the fuck do you think anyone wants to look at your favorites? Man, it's probably inferior crap with shitty photos. You should go back to your craft room and hang yourself with some of that cheap tacky fucking silk garland flowers that we know you own, you low class peon. Leave the treasury making to the stay at home moms, and people with working spouses who have connected themselves to one another exclusively who are entitled to show everyone their favorites constantly because, fuck, those lazy and careless dipshits on etsy staff are willing to call them "tastemakers."

Here's a clue, Pat, they're not tastemakers. They're people who have the free time on their hands to manipulate the system to their benefit because the system is being run by a bunch of fucking idiots.

According to MaryMary, the etsy staff cannot figure out what constitutes a repeat.
A front page repeat is a seller who repeatedly appears on the front page treasury. How fucking hard was that?

Now apparently, the etsy staff have no ability to know who has been featured on the front page.
Now, you can choose to believe that. It reads as being pretty unbelievable. It reads as exceptionally unbelievable in light of the fact that the etsy staff have told us that to make the front page you need to have:
an exceptional product
exceptional photos

So, how does etsy staff see exceptional product with exceptional photos and somehow not have the ability to process or remember the username of the person who makes such exceptional shit? Does etsy only hire people with short term memory problems, or are all of you illiterate? Because, if I go to a retail site and see exceptional shit, I'm bound to either simply remember it or bother to take the time to jot the fucking info down (yes, literally by hand).

How am I supposed to believe that your staff actually spots exceptional stuff but cannot see that they keep featuring the same stuff by the same people. How am I supposed to believe that you are so perceptive when you act so imperceptive? How does one have such selective vision?

Unless, of course, this shit about "exceptional product and photos" is actually one big exceptional sham, which, pretty much is what it has to be at this point... and as it turns out, we take exception to exceptional shams, and in general, shit that doesn't work for everyone when you keep trying to feed us this bullshit about how we are such a community.

This line you troll out about "exceptional photos and products" is just empty misdirection. It means nothing. The only means that having the forums act like some retarded echo-chamber of this nonsense about "photo quality" is to send your non-featured, non-repeat, non-favorite members into a tailspin of false self doubt. It's one big it's not etsy, it's you; and that's bullshit. It's a broken system that a bunch of lazy motherfuckers won't fix.

There's likely nothing wrong with your photos, because really, this is a shitty photo
http://www.etsy.com/view_transaction.php?transaction_id=25529468
Yeah, it is. First off, the model is looking directly at the camera. That's actually a clothing seller's merchandising photo no-no. The dress is so much in the shadows that it blends right in with the dresser behind the photo. And the photo is actually blurry, which means that the trajectory of the shot vs. the setting on which it was shot were not in sync.

Your staff doesn't know shit about photo quality. There's nothing in any of their profiles that suggest they know jack shit about anything about the professional aspects of retail. So, seeing this same nonsense from them all the time is just insulting.

If you can't see how many times you feature the same people on the front page, how do expect me to believe that you can determine what is an exceptional photo? I need an explanation for your qualifications as it pertains to your inability to compile basic statistical information about your choices.

I don't have that, because you have failed to supply it, because being honest about how dishonest and biased you are isn't really something you want to admit.

That, and your system is broken, because everyone can't make a treasury, and because the same people always still have multiple treasuries. Until the whole thing stops acting like the echo chamber of exclusivity based solely on who has nothing better to do than sit on their ass for endless hours waiting for shit on the internet to expire, then etsy will never realize it's potential to truly act as THE place to buy and sell all things handmade.

You have the diversity of the world at your fingertips, but you're too lazy and childish to embrace it.

Utter etsy fail.

a special case: Janice

We encourage all of you non-moron, non-assholes to go off to the forums and participate in this thread:
Tell Etsy what you consider to be FP repetition
http://www.etsy.com/forums_thread.php?thread_id=6436305

So far, popular answers to how frequently should one seller be featured on the front page range from once per week to once every 10 days. Great practical and pragmatic responses, for the most part.

Now, of course, we do expect some dipshits to post in the thread, fortunately we didn't have to wait long for JaniceCordeiro to give her trite and meaningless opinion... it's a whopper, and yes, you will be dumber for having read it.

The front page belongs to Etsy. That should be their decision. I think the front page is obsessed over way too often. I'm getting tired of seeing people stamping their feet and saying me, me, me. We get incensed if Etsy puts something in "our" shops yet the group mentality is that the shop keepers own the front page too. That's Etsy's advertising space. Took me awhile to come to this conclusion because the group mentality becomes invasive at times.

First of all, fuck you, you moron. My god, could you possibly have anything of less value to add to the discussion? You're almost as bad as favoritism / repetition denier Tinahdee, who I gather wishes we would stop mentioning her idiotic posts here.

If etsy didn't suck balls with the front page favoritism and repetition in the first place, then none of this would currently be a topic of discussion.

However, if you did happen to be around a few days prior you might understand why Janice thinks the staff does such a fine job...

What the Heck Is

What the hell is wrong with you people. I have never seen such nonsense. The jealousy on this site is beyond disgusting.

You should be happy that someone did something very well. And was honored for that. But instead you whine like little kids. If you want to be honored for something here's a clue --- get better than they are. If you don't want to put in the work to get better, then shutup! Let the people who did something really good shine for their brief moment and congratulate them. Like a grown up!

Read your posts. If you haven't embarrassed yourself you didn't look closely enough.

Guess what! I made the front page yesterday. Picked by Etsy. You know how many people said well done? One!

I'm also going to be in the next edition of Better Homes and Gardens Holiday Magazine.

I also was requested to include some of my sculptures in a new gallery in Silver Springs, Maryland.

There, you weren't, so now you really have something to complain about.

To the people who won the latest honors I say VERY WELL DONE AND CONGRATULATIONS!

To the childish complainers I say GROW THE HELL UP!

Yeah, thanks to the fact that we have been rightfully and relentlessly critiquing the front page favoritism and repetition, etsy has gone out of their way to do a sub-standard job of pretending to feature more people, while still relentlessly featuring the SAME people. As you can read, JaniceCordeiro is one of the people who has benefited from our efforts.
(fortunately, we appreciate irony)

And yes, you did read that correctly, JaniceCordeiro had no one tell her what a great person she was for making FP or whatever she claimed to have accomplished, so she started a snide thread to let all you people know how ungrateful you bastards are for not falling at her feet when she entered the room... that, and apparently she was incapable of understanding the sarcasm of another forum thread which was really why she went on this tirade to begin with.

So, hey, if douchebags like JaniceCordeiro can make the front page, of course they don't want a level playing field, and yes, apparently Virginia, you are expected to pepper her with praise.

Fucking moron.

-----
Okay, I had to edit this post to point out a few things (at the behest of the council):
JaniceCordeiro is apparently no friend of grammar and punctuation.
First up "---" this is not an actual symbol of punctuation. It is a short dash "-" for a thought that will be interrupted but then completed, e.g.
JaniceCordeiro is a moron of the highest degree - not that that's an honor - just stating a fact.
OR it's "--" or "—" (the long dash, for a thought that will be interrupted but not completed).
Learn your dashes, motherfucker.

"get better than they are"
God, my head hurts. You don't end a sentence with a preposition. I guess it's hard to get better than they are when you can't formulate the sentence correctly.

"If you haven't embarrassed yourself you didn't look closely enough."
It is called an "If / Then" clause, you dipshit. "If" being followed by "Then", which comes after the comma.

"Let the people who did something really good shine for their brief moment and congratulate them." You mean the people who did something really well? And how about a comma? Are you familiar with that form of punctuation?

"Like a grown up!"
This is a sentence fragment. It's not artsy.

Fucking learn to form sentences, you moron.

*this concludes this brief session from the language police*

A word about Treasuries, repetition, and curators

From the editorial desk in response to emilybidwell

If you make claims about faults in the member curated treasuries, then as an employee you should seek out means by which to correct those faults.

If etsy has a policy about not promoting treasuries to the front page that lack alternates, then it should be stated at the bottom of the treasury with the rest of the rules.

If etsy has a policy about not promoting treasuries to the front page that contain items from the curator, then it should be stated at the bottom of the treasury with the rest of the rules.

Why isn't it?
If etsy is misleading its users about a feature, then the fault lies with etsy. Only a total coward with no integrity whatsoever would place the fault on it's users.

So, while this here is a strictly volunteer endeavor, I am fortunate to have a savant at my disposal.
Having read the comments that emilybidwell left in the thread -- I sent The Savant to the treasury. The Savant is the one who generally supplies The List. Yes, I'm capitalizing these things to be An Asshole. It just sounds more official that way, anyway The Savant approves, just like Mikey.

So, The Savant went to the Main Treasury. Mind you, The Savant is a generic run-of-the-mill etsy user. So, The Savant has no admin powers, and therefore cannot see your alternates. But well, fuck it, because The Savant is a savant. You know, one of those phonebook reading "Rain Man" types.

The Savant took some statistics based on the groupings:

category 1: no repeats / no curator featured in the treasury
category 2: front page repeats
category 3: curator featured in treasury

There is no bleed between the numbers compiled in The Savant's assessment. Curators who featured themselves in their own treasuries were treated as their own grouping which negated any qualities of repeats or lack of repeats.

Total number of treasuries sampled: 293 in 1 sitting of the Main Treasury.
category 1 - there's nothing wrong with this treasury: 200 treasuries
category 2 - front page repeats: 51 treasuries
category 3 - curator featured in treasury: 42 treasuries

The Savant looked at 293 treasuries; 200 of which contained no front page repeats or curators featuring themselves. Of those 200 only 4 were blatantly Christian-only, 1 was Jewish. There were no Hispanic, Arabic, Indian, or Asian themed treasuries in the Savant's sample. There were no treasuries involving nudity or Nazism or racism.

So, if you disqualify the 5 religious pandering treasuries from the mix, then 195 out of a sample of 293 is 66.55% of treasuries that ought to be usable with no repeats or crossover or curators featuring themselves. And those were just samples from the Main Treasury.

If there are currently 195 treasuries with no repeats, why then, are there all the repeats? This doesn't square.
It doesn't square more when you consider that 12 front page treasuries per day are specifically selected by the staff. If the etsy staff who are paid via the listing fees of the etsy users have the time to "browse through etsy's categories" to find things, then you should easily be able to come up with 1 to 4 items to use as alternates in the instance that a member-curated treasury does not contain them.

What is the justification for having the ability to select items for etsy curated front page treasuries while not possessing the same ability to add potential alternates to member curated treasuries that don't have alternates? You have the unbelievable ability to compile your own treasuries, but you are suddenly incapable of finding 1 to 4 extraneous items to potentially add to someone else's list? Really? That seems contradictory and mendacious.

The only way that it's believable that etsy employees are incompetent when it comes to generating fresh alternates is if the "search" function is completely useless or your employees are in fact all comatose.

And moreover, the curator featured treasuries: why don't you just use your own policy about promoting a whole or partial list to the homepage? Again, etsy is capable of cobbling together approximately 12 front page treasuries per day, has a policy about promoting whole or partial lists to the front page, and yet will not take a few minutes to edit a treasury simply because the curator put one of their own items in it? How fucking lazy are you motherfuckers? That has got to be the most incompetent pool of humanity on the planet. A cat running across a keyboard could generate alternates and replacements, and probably without repeats.

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Now, because The Savant sat there and stared at the computer for 2 hours reading, observing, tabulating, and otherwise being savant-like, The Savant wrote down some treasuries of note.
It does actually feel kind of wrong to feature these people here, but, what the hell, if it keeps my emotionally dead quasi-autistic number cruncher happy...
http://www.etsy.com/treasury_list.php?room_id=111757
http://www.etsy.com/treasury_list.php?room_id=111759
http://www.etsy.com/treasury_list.php?room_id=111749
http://www.etsy.com/treasury_list.php?room_id=111735
and The Savant recommends this replacement after 1 minute of searching
http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=39101681
http://www.etsy.com/treasury_list.php?room_id=111905
http://www.etsy.com/treasury_list.php?room_id=111904
http://www.etsy.com/treasury_list.php?room_id=111938
http://www.etsy.com/treasury_list.php?room_id=111937
http://www.etsy.com/treasury_list.php?room_id=111805
http://www.etsy.com/treasury_list.php?room_id=111722
http://www.etsy.com/treasury_list.php?room_id=111667
http://www.etsy.com/treasury_list.php?room_id=111569
http://www.etsy.com/treasury_list.php?room_id=111638

front page repeats...

Etsy staff are completely incompetent and shameless.

Now, these are some of the repeats from SUNDAY
Sunday saw these front page repeats...
allencompanyinc (regular repeat, this week + TWICE last week, the week before last)
AwakenJournaling (regular repeat, this week + last week, the week before last)
humblebea (perennial repeat, this week, last week, etc)
NanLawson (regular repeat, this week + last week, the week before last)
quotesandnotes (this week + multiple times last week)
RUBYrecycled (regular repeat, this week + last week, the week before last)
slinkymalinkicat (perennial repeat, this week + multiple times last week, and the week before last)
xenotees (regular repeat, this week + TWICE last week, the week before last)

So, surprise surprise, who are the MONDAY repeats?
AwakenJournaling (regular repeat, this week Sunday + Monday, + last week, the week before last)
humblebea (perennial repeat, this week Sunday + Monday, + last week, etc)
maclancy (regular repeat, this week + TWICE last week, week before last)
marysgranddaughter (regular repeat)
NanLawson (regular repeat, this week + last week, week before last)
olaladesign (regular repeat, repeat curator, this week + last week, week before last)
StudioZen (this week + last week)

So, emilybidwell, what was that you stated?
http://www.etsy.com/forums_thread.php?thread_id=6190337&page=4

As a rule of thumb, we do not alter member's Treasuries. We are currently using nearly all the Treasuries that are offered, but cannot force people to select different items for their collections. Since there is no way for community curators to cross reference eachtother's items, the more community Treasuries we use, the more repeats we should expect to see.

Not only is that statement completely false.
While humblebea in a 11 treasuries: http://www.craftopolis.com/index.php?user=humblebea
That still leaves a minimum of 544 treasuries to pick from.
When you featured a treasury with XX on SUNDAY, you're then going to justify featuring XX on the front page on MONDAY and blame the repetition on the curators of treasuries? How is that?

The most plausible extremely half-ass excuse for curators being blamed for repetition by etsy staff is in a scenario where etsy staff have endorsed favorites. If you put people they like in your treasury, then you might make it to the front page. As it turns out, it's the way etsy staff have been operating the front page treasury curation for the past year. Etsy staff have entrenched the favoritism and have fostered an environment with has encouraged the repetition.

What kind of paid employee of a company blames its members for its own faults? A coward.

http://www.etsy.com/treasury.php?ref=fp_nav_treasury
Only one Treasury list per person. Do not create lists with multiple accounts at the same time.

Treasury is not intended for personal promotion. Please do not include more than one of your own items.

Etsy may, at times, promote whole or partial selections from a Treasury list to the home page.

This list will expire two days after creation. Bonus time (up to 24 hours) may be randomly added to the lifetime of your list.

Etsy reserves the right to remove Treasury lists at any time.

So, if etsy may promote whole or partial selections, why then are they A. incapable of removing repeats, and B. incapable of replacing them with items not by other repeats?

Presumably, the listing fees generated by your users are generating your salaries. You know, etsy isn't staffed by volunteers. So if the paid employees are "browsing through etsy's categories" as they so often claim with the front page treasuries curated by etsy staff, then why are those treasuries always riddled with repeats? Why can't etsy staff find new things? How fucking broken is the search feature? Is there something wrong with etsy's computer equipment? Is your internet connection fucked up? Do you need to call tech support? Are you blind? And if you are, then are the universal access features on your computers broken?

What's the next excuse? Because apparently the current one is that you can't be bothered to use your own provision to "promote whole or partial selections from a Treasury list to the home page."
If you can't follow or practice your own provisions, then what can you do?
Perhaps etsy should have some staff turnover and employ some people who are competent.

Perennial etsy fuck up, favoritism, repeats and other unsavory behavior that erodes the trust of your member community.
"etsy suck" on every level of social commerce.

nazi memorobilia...

Remember the nazi flag? No? Then google it.
horiryu
http://www.etsy.com/shop/horiryu

racist postcard
http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=39242841

racist postcard
http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=39232442

nazi postcard
http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=38890854

nazi memorobilia
http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=36617252

Feel free to report these items, even though they have already been reported.
How many flags does a nazi item get before it is removed?

the GIFT GUIDES: react!

Hello bitches!

Try something: organize chaos and terrorize with it.

You’re not in the gift guides? Hey, neither am I. But you know what, etsy ADMIN have come to your shop to “call out” to all these items in other shops… (try to see irony, or levels of syllogism, use your creativity people.)

So…

A. Boycott these shops! Convo your fellow etsy peeps with this list and say, “hey, fuck these people, etsy is calling out right there in my shop for you to patronize them over me… so DO NOT PATRONIZE these shops.”

B. Flag their shit! Go to those shops, and go over their shit with a fine toothed comb. Flag the fuck out of their shops and their items for the most minor and ridiculous and petty violations, esp. tags!

C. Inundate all of their contact emails and render their “customer support” more useless than it already is. Seriously, shut them down with “spam”. Find some email address of yours that isn’t connected to your etsy shop in any way shape or form (perhaps your husband, boyfriend, lover, wife, girlfriend…): because these are petty wannabe hipster fucktards and if you use your own addy, rest assured you will be muted and shut down: be clever bitches: be anonymous! Use that non-etsy email address to contact every etsy contact email once a day, every day for a week (yes, even the irrelevant ones) with this copy-and-pasted statement:

Dear etsy, I find it disgraceful that you are spamming my shop with TOU-violating call-outs to all of the shops on this list. I find it disgusting that you charge for useless site features while giving these select people free promotion. I will not patronize these shops, but thank you for calling them out so relentlessly so that I know not to buy from them. I will also be telling my family, friends, and associates not to patronize them.

CardboardSafari

artlab

toybreaker

dbabcock

elineof

GurKimel

lirola

TheHandworkGroup

soule

patkas

elizandaxel

carolhannah

DolorisPetunia

EightSeasons

girlsavage

hollystalder

jennykim

Middleburg

sarahseven

staceywinters

tinahdee

bethanylorelle

bpoetic

chicsindesigndotcom

Hopeless

Kcoline

lulubugjewelry

misterrob

NaturesCabinet

OneHundredYears

PeekoApparel

pinpinn

sherrytruitt

theblackapple

theenchantedcupboard

toosis

vrreis

annekiel

blisscandles

CarolinaCottage

chicsindesigndotcom

coup

eclu

elinart

imotime

JosephSpinaleFurn

kittybblove

lovemaestore

marysgranddaughter

marywibis

melaniefavreau

mooshoopork

MountainGirlClothing

paperacorn

paperdollwoodshop

ParadiseBodyShop

PearsonMaron

PipocaHandmade

RedMarionette

RitzyMisfit

SmallEarthVintage

Storied

Silvia66

thesmallobject

thevintagecloset

TimelessVixenVintage

tinywarbler

truLuxe

yystudio